{"id":18340,"date":"2017-01-30T08:31:25","date_gmt":"2017-01-30T07:31:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/master.hudo.com\/si\/2015\/01\/30\/pretreslo-vas-bo-zakaj-ljudje-v-resnici-varamo\/"},"modified":"2017-02-04T08:24:49","modified_gmt":"2017-02-04T07:24:49","slug":"pretreslo-vas-bo-zakaj-ljudje-v-resnici-varamo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/pretreslo-vas-bo-zakaj-ljudje-v-resnici-varamo\/","title":{"rendered":"Pretreslo vas bo, zakaj ljudje v resnici varamo"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ste \u017ee kdaj bili prevarani? Ste iskali krivdo v sebi, v partnerju, povsod? Vse v glavi tiso\u010dkrat premleli? Na\u0161li tiso\u010d in en razlog? Pa spet nobenega? Vas \u0161e vedno stisne pri srcu in ne morete odpustiti, preboleti, kreniti dalje? Ste padli na dno?<\/p>\n

In na drugi strani … Ste \u017ee kdaj varali? Ste na\u0161li v sebi pravi razlog, zakaj ste to storili? Ali pa ste kot zaljubljen najstnik odvihrali iz razmerja? Povsem verjetno. Esther Perel<\/strong>, svetovno znana partnerska svetovalka in avtorica knji\u017ene uspe\u0161nice “Mating in Captivity”<\/strong> (Parjenje v ujetni\u0161tvu), je spregovorila o tem, kaj se v resnici zgodi, ko za\u010dne partner strast iskati izven zveze.<\/p>\n

\n

Zanimivo, ljudje danes ne varajo manj, ker lahko odidejo. Ravno nasprotno. Vsi, ki so kdaj koli pri\u0161li k meni in so varali, mi re\u010dejo isto: Po\u010dutim se \u017dIVEGA.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Perelova nadalje razlaga varanje kot nekak\u0161en kompromis med varnostjo in pustolov\u0161\u010dino. “Ko spoznamo novo osebo, znova izkusimo pozornost, fokus na sebi, obojestransko obsesijo. Gre za zaljubljenost. Vse afere imajo v ozadju neke vrste ljubezensko zgodbo, ne le brezglavi seks.”<\/em><\/p>\n

Gre torej za pomanjkanje pozornosti, ki sta si jo partnerja naklonila v dolgoletni zvezi? Perelova gre s svojo razlago v drugo smer in zadane naravnost v srce:<\/p>\n

\n

V resnici ne \u017eelimo toliko zapustiti osebe, s katero smo, kot osebo, v katero smo se spremenili.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Ko enkrat na varanje gledamo skozi prizmo tovrstnega hrepenenja, lahko la\u017eje razumemo, zakaj ljudje zapustijo partnerja, trdi svetovalka. In \u0161e, da so la\u017ei in izdajstva del tega hrepenenja, nekak\u0161na kolateralna \u0161koda.<\/p>\n

\n

Kar je za nekoga \u0161iritev<\/strong> in rast<\/strong>, je za drugega bole\u010dina<\/strong> in izdajstvo<\/strong>,<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\u0161e razlo\u017ei Perelova. In nas spomni. In opomni. Kako pomembno je, da moramo v partnerski zvezi \u017eiveti in ne \u017eivotariti. In trdo garati za zvezo, pa naj se sli\u0161i \u0161e tako neromanti\u010dno. Na misel so mi pri\u0161le besede Filip Fliserja, da ga ni takega talenta na svetu, ki bi lahko zmagoval brez vztrajnosti in trdega treninga. Tako tudi ni zaljubljenosti na svetu, ki bi lahko obdr\u017eala zvezo brez tega, da si vedno znova naklonimo \u010das, spo\u0161tovanje, ob\u010dudovanje, intimnost, smeh, skupne dogodiv\u0161\u010dine, nova vznemirjenja. In tako opremljeni veslamo skozi grme\u010de valove vsakdana.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Pozabite na vse razloge za varanje, ki ste jih sli\u0161ali do sedaj. Svetovno znana partnerska svetovalka je dala odgovor, ki bi vas utegnil pretresti.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1091],"tags":[1473,1452,1376],"source":[1518,1530,1529],"supertag":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nPretreslo vas bo, zakaj ljudje v resnici varamo - Hudo Slovenija<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/pretreslo-vas-bo-zakaj-ljudje-v-resnici-varamo\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"sl_SI\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Pretreslo vas bo, zakaj ljudje v resnici varamo - Hudo Slovenija\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Pozabite na vse razloge za varanje, ki ste jih sli\u0161ali do sedaj. 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