{"id":19664,"date":"2016-04-04T09:05:45","date_gmt":"2016-04-04T07:05:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/master.hudo.com\/si\/2016\/04\/04\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/"},"modified":"2016-04-12T16:25:14","modified_gmt":"2016-04-12T14:25:14","slug":"kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/","title":{"rendered":"Kaj privede do nezvestobe?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Foto: Thinkstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Opazujem par proti koncu tridesetih let starosti, imata dva otroka. Mo\u017e je bil nekaj let priliman na kav\u010d, sicer je pomagal pri skrbi za otroka, ko sta bila dojen\u010dka, potem pa se je <\/span>popoldan po slu\u017ebi utapljal v igranju spletnih igric in nerganju, ker mu je vse \u0161lo na \u017eivce<\/b>. \u017dena se je v teh nekaj letih <\/span>navadila, da je vse sama postorila, se ukvarjala z otrokoma, skrbela za finance, za hi\u0161na opravila<\/b>. Ni ve\u010d pogre\u0161ala pomo\u010di mo\u017ea, saj je on vedno, ko ga je kaj prosila, odvrnil, da sedaj ne more in da bo postoril kar ga prosi malce kasneje. Seveda <\/span>ta \u00bbmalce\u00ab kasneje nikoli ni napo\u010dil<\/b>. <\/span><\/p>\n

Tole opisano je odli\u010den recept, da se par odtuji…<\/h2>\n

Sicer \u017eivijo skupaj kot dru\u017eina, a partnerja oziroma zakonca \u017eivita vsak na svojem planetu. In nekega dne za\u010dne gospe v slu\u017ebi pihati na du\u0161o sodelavec, prijazen samski mo\u0161ki, ki opazi, da ima gospa novo pri\u010desko, pa se na kavicah za\u010dneta pobli\u017ee spoznavati. <\/span>Ona se zaljubi v sodelavca in to uspe\u0161no skriva<\/b>. Iz slu\u017ebe prihaja kasneje, ima ve\u010dkrat slu\u017ebene zabave, ki \u00a0trajajo dlje \u010dasa v no\u010d. Mo\u017e ni\u010desar ne sumi, saj je zatopljen v igrice, otroci pa se znajo po\u010dasi \u017ee sami spraviti v posteljo. <\/span>Ko jo ljubimec povabi, da se preseli z otrokoma k njemu, je primorana mo\u017eu povedati za prevaro ter da odhaja.<\/b><\/p>\n

Mo\u017e \u010dez no\u010d ob spoznanju, da \u017eena \u017eeli oditi, spregleda, da jo \u0161e vedno mo\u010dno ljubi in da no\u010de, da bi od\u0161la<\/b>. Prepri\u010duje jo, da naj ostane, saj bo poslej vse druga\u010de, saj da je spregledal svoje napake. Ko ga je \u017eena vsa leta poprej prosila, da naj se z njo pogovarja, naj z njo partnersko sodeluje in da bi bila ljube\u010d par, jo je zavra\u010dal in ignoriral, zdaj pa je on tisti, ki ho\u010de za nazaj vse nadomestiti. \u017deli se z njo pogovarjati, ji dopoveduje, da jo ljubi, da ji bo vse \u017eelje uresni\u010dil, da jo bo osre\u010dil. <\/span>Ne razume, kaj se je v \u017eenski prelomilo in zakaj mu ona ne dovoli ve\u010d, da se ji pribli\u017ea, zavra\u010da njegove objeme in dotike<\/b>. Ne prenese ve\u010d mo\u017ea, njegovega vonja, kako dr\u017ei \u017elico pri kosilu, kako se obla\u010di, kako jo gleda. <\/span>Vse to jo odvra\u010da od njega, popolnoma hladna je in \u010dustveno neodzivna<\/b>. Njena ljubezen do mo\u017ea je umrla \u017ee nekaj let nazaj. Ljubimec ji je pokazal, da je spet \u017eelena in posebna \u017eenska, da je vredna ljubezni. <\/span>Ona odhaja, ne oziraje se ni\u010d ve\u010d na moledovanje mo\u017ea in njegove solze, naj ostane.<\/b><\/p>\n

Kaj torej privede do nezvestobe?<\/b><\/h2>\n

Odtujenost partnerjev, ko dopustita, da njun odnos odmre, umre, razpade, ko je vse samoumevno in dolgo\u010dasno. Strasti v odnosu ni, spolnosti \u017ee leto ali dve ni na seznamu \u017eelja, spita kot dva cimra, sicer fizi\u010dno skupaj, a nikoli ve\u010d kot mo\u0161ki in \u017eenska. Za otroka se sicer korektno skrbi, a spet je dejstvo, da otroci v tak\u0161nih sostanovalskih skupnostih niso dele\u017eni pogleda na objem star\u0161ev med seboj, ne vidijo izkazovanja ljubezni in pripadnosti, kar zopet ustvari dolo\u010dene vzorce, ki jih bodo kasneje odrasli otroci odnesli v njihove partnerske zveze, ko zopet niti sami ne bodo znali in zmogli svoji punci ali fantu pokazati, da ga\/jo ljubijo. <\/span><\/p>\n

Re\u0161itev?<\/b> \u010ce se partnerski odnos neguje, zaliva s pozornostjo, pripadnostjo, seksom, ljubkovanjem, ki je na seznamu opravil vsak dan in to sproti, s komunikacijo, razpravljanjem o razli\u010dnosti stali\u0161\u010d, o tem, kako se re\u0161ujejo nesoglasja, o tem kako se v zavezni\u0161tvu vzgaja otroke, potem se zelo verjetno ne bo oblikoval spro\u017eilec, ki bi omogo\u010dil zagledanost v kak\u0161no drugo osebo. <\/span>\u010ce ste se same zapletle v skrivno romanco ali zaljubljenost in mo\u017ea prevarale, kako boste to razre\u0161ile?<\/b><\/p>\n

Avtorica prispevka sem univerzitetna diplomirana socialna pedagoginja in diplomirana socialna delavka <\/span>Melita Kuhar<\/b>, ki vodim projekt <\/span>Svetovalnica<\/b>, <\/span>www.svetovalnica.si<\/a><\/span><\/strong>, dosegljiva sem na tel.\u0161t. <\/span>031 666 168<\/b>. \u010ce bi se radi naro\u010dili na individualno svetovanje ali me kaj povpra\u0161ali, pi\u0161ite na: <\/span>info@svetovalnica.si<\/a><\/span><\/strong>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ve\u010d o zgoraj napisanem si lahko preberete tudi socialnem omre\u017eju <\/span>www.facebook.com\/Svetovalnica<\/a><\/span>. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Odtujenost partnerjev, ko dopustita, da njun odnos odmre, umre, razpade, ko je vse samoumevno in dolgo\u010dasno…to je odli\u010den recept za nezvestobo.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1092],"tags":[1427,3301,1376],"source":[1365,1364,1334],"supertag":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nKaj privede do nezvestobe? - Hudo Slovenija<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"sl_SI\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Kaj privede do nezvestobe? - Hudo Slovenija\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Odtujenost partnerjev, ko dopustita, da njun odnos odmre, umre, razpade, ko je vse samoumevno in dolgo\u010dasno...to je odli\u010den recept za nezvestobo.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Hudo Slovenija\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/hudo.si\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2016-04-04T07:05:45+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2016-04-12T14:25:14+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/2\/2016\/04\/thinkstockphotos-511932376-scaled.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"2560\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1440\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"hudo\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@hudo_si\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@hudo_si\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"hudo\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"hudo\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/#\/schema\/person\/601cf3379633985b20f7e50f2bb47707\"},\"headline\":\"Kaj privede do nezvestobe?\",\"datePublished\":\"2016-04-04T07:05:45+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2016-04-12T14:25:14+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/\"},\"wordCount\":722,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"Melita Kuhar\",\"nezvestoba\",\"varanje\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Seks & partnerstvo\"],\"inLanguage\":\"sl-SI\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/hudo.com\/si\/lifestyle\/seks-partnerstvo\/kaj-privede-do-nezvestobe\/\",\"name\":\"Kaj privede do nezvestobe? 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